So, you’ve got your eye on a girl you see regularly, maybe she’s a friend, a coworker, or someone in your social circle. And you’re thinking, “how can I take this to the next level?” Well, you’re in luck because we’re going to guide you through the process of picking up a girl you already know.
We have a step-by-step guide, with practical examples you can use right away. This guide will help you turn your platonic relationship into a romantic one without risking your friendship or making her feel uncomfortable.
5 simple steps to pick up a girl you already know.
Step 1
Test the Waters
Before jumping in, it’s important to gauge whether she might be interested in you in the same way.
– Make casual physical contact: Try touching her arm lightly when she says something funny or interesting.
– Use harmless flirtatious language: Use playful language such as teasing, joking around, or call her by a nickname.
– Observe her body language: If she’s constantly looking at you, laughing at your jokes, or leaning into you, then it could be a sign that she has feelings for you.
– Use social media: Like and comment on her photos or posts. This could spark a conversation between you two.
– Spend more alone time together: Start by doing activities or events alone together, such as going to the movies, coffee, or drinks.
Step 2
Bring Up the Idea
After testing the waters, you can start steering the conversation towards a more romantic nature.
– Mention upcoming events or date ideas you’d like to do with her: “I’ve been wanting to check out this cool new restaurant, would you want to go with me sometime?”
– Ask her out directly: “Would you like to go on a date with me?”.
– Be honest: “I’ve been thinking about our friendship, and I realized I have feelings for you. Would you want to give it a chance?”.
– Give her a compliment and watch her reaction: “I’ve always found you really interesting and attractive”.
– Use humor: “So when are we getting married, again? Or was it just in my dreams?”
Step 3
Make it Easy for Her
If she agrees to the idea, make it easy for her to say yes.
– Plan the date: Take charge of the planning and ensure everything is in place in advance (location, time, etc.).
– Keep it casual: Try something relatively low-key and comfortable like drinks or coffee, drinks at a rooftop bar, or a picnic in the park.
– Be Relaxed: Don’t make the date seem too formal or forceful. Avoid talking about long-term goals like marriage, kids, or moving in together on the first date.
– Be respectful: Don’t pressure her, give her the option to say no or reschedule if she needs to.
– Thank her for coming out: Make sure to thank her for coming out, even if it doesn’t lead to anything further.
Step 4
Mind the Details
Now that you have gone on a date or two, be mindful of how you treat her, and the details of your interaction.
– Dress well: Make sure to dress appropriately for the date location and time.
– Pay attention: Listen to her, engage with her, and show her that you value her thoughts and feelings.
– Be chivalrous: Offer to open doors, pull out chairs, or pick her up/drop her off.
– Avoid discussing exes or negative topics: Don’t bring up any topics that could make her feel uncomfortable such as exes or politics.
– Be thoughtful: Small gestures go a long way. Offer to pay for the bill, bring her favorite flowers or candy on the second date.
Step 5
Follow-Up and Progress
Finally, it’s vital to follow-up and assess how things are going, and where the relationship is heading.
– Connect regularly: Make it a priority to connect with her frequently (texting, calling, meeting up, etc.).
– Show Interest: Ask her how her day was, what she’s been up to, or suggest something fun to do together.
– Be open and honest: Communicate your thoughts and feelings, and be willing to listen to hers.
– Progress Gradually: Take things one step at a time, and let the relationship develop organically.
– Be patient: Remember that building a relationship takes time and be patient with the whole process.
See the steps as infographic
Examples of three real-life conversations showing how to pick up a girl you already know.
Conversation 1:
Place of the conversation: Coffee shop on a weekday afternoon
People speaking: Matt & Emily
Matt: Hey Emily, how’s your day going?
Emily: It’s going pretty well. Just grabbing some coffee during my lunch break. How about you?
Matt: Same here. And actually, I was wondering if you’d like to grab dinner with me tonight? Catch up a bit.
Emily: I don’t know, Matt. We’ve known each other for so long, I don’t want to risk ruining the friendship we have.
Matt: I understand, but what if we just see how dinner goes? We can keep it light and see if there’s any spark there.
Emily: Okay, I guess that’s fair. What time were you thinking?
Matt: I was thinking 7 pm. I know this great Italian place downtown.
Emily: Alright, sounds good. Let’s meet there at 7.
Conversation 2:
Place of the conversation: Text/Online Chat
People speaking: David & Rachel
David: Hey Rachel, how’s it going?
Rachel: Hey David, it’s going well thanks. Just busy with work. How about you?
David: Same here. But I was actually wondering if you wanted to grab dinner sometime this week?
Rachel: I appreciate the offer, David. But I don’t want to date anyone from work.
David: Oh, I understand. But we’ve known each other for so long outside of work too. And I think there’s a potential for us to be good together.
Rachel: I don’t know, David. I just don’t think it’s a good idea.
David: Well, the offer is always open if you change your mind. Have a good day, Rachel.
Conversation 3:
Place of the conversation: Park on a Sunday afternoon
People speaking: Jake & Samantha
Jake: Hey Samantha, what are you up to today?
Samantha: Not much, just taking a walk in the park. What about you?
Jake: Same here. And actually, I was wondering if you’d like to grab some lunch together? We can sit by the lake and catch up.
Samantha: I don’t know, Jake. We’ve been friends for a while now, and I don’t want to make things weird by going on a date.
Jake: I understand, Samantha. But I think we have a good connection, and I believe we could be really good together.
Samantha: Okay, why not? Let’s see how lunch goes. Do you have any restaurant in mind?
Jake: Yes, actually, there’s this great sandwich shop nearby that I love. Let’s grab some subs and head down to the lake.
Conclusion
The key to picking up a girl you already know is to take things gradually, be honest, and respectful of her boundaries. Use the steps and examples we’ve given you and tweak them to fit your situation. Who knows, you might end up building a beautiful relationship with the girl of your dreams.
So go ahead, take the first step, and try it out in practice today!
